Quakeweek
April 30, 1997


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Microsoft Announces Own Quake Competitor


All Hail Satan, Prince of Darkness!REDMOND, WA - Microsoft announced today a 'better way to experience first-person gaming' with the release of its own free 3-D game, the imaginatively-named Microsoft Gun. MS Gun is set to compete against id Software's immensely popular Quake.

"Microsoft Gun brings Quakers a superior way to experience the thrills of senseless violence and mayhem of Quake, and provides a launch point for our strategy to establish dominion over the entire gaming industry," said Bill Gates, Chairmain and CEO of Microsoft Corporation and Greedy Troll of The Computing World.

MS Gun is virtually identical to Quake in technology, concept, design, and gameplay (except for the message "Where do you want to go today?" popping up every time you enter a slipgate). However, in addition to supporting Quake's features, Microsoft has also incorporated its own proprietary developers' technologies, namely ActiveQ and VBConsole.

"ActiveQ and VBConsole will not compete with Quake C and aliasing," a Microsoft spokesperson said. "With our below-the-belt marketing tactics, we'll make sure nothing else will have a chance."

When asked if Direct3D support will be added, he simply sighed and muttered, "Carmack was right."

Microsoft Gun 1.02 is available free for download at the Microsoft website. If your system does not meet the minimum requirements of 300MB of hard drive space, 64MB of RAM and a Pentium Pro 200, Microsoft eagerly advises you to "buy a faster computer."

(Note that if you have an older version of MS Gun, you will have to download the entire game all over again, as Microsoft disdains patches.)